 Our boss has little to say; and says it over and over again! |
 Don't be sexist. Broads hate that! |
 Women who aspire to be equal to men have no ambition |
 We will continue to hold daily meetings until I find out why no work is getting done! |
 It is as bad as you think, and they are out to get you |
 Never underestimate the power of very stupid people in large groups! |
 For every winner there are dozens of losers. Chances are you're one of them. |
 TEAMWORK means never having to take all the blame yourself. |
 I didn't say it was your fault. I said I was going to blame you for it. |
 You can't help liking the boss. If you don't, he'll fire you! |
| Quitters never win. Winners never quit. But those who never win and never quit are idiots. | Are you tired, run-down, irritable? No? Well I am, so sod off! |
| James Bond rules, OOK | To get things done by a committee it should consist of three persons, two of whom are always absent. |
| Putting it in and out and shaking it all about rules, Hokey Cokey | I thought I wanted a career. Turns out I just wanted a pay cheque! |
| Failure - when your best just isn't good enough! | Delegating is a sign of weakness; let others do it! |
| You'll always miss 100% of the shots you don't take. And probably 99% of those that you do. | Statistics show that people who have more birthdays live longer |
| If you can't learn to do something well, learn to enjoy doing it poorly. | Anarchy, no rules, OK |
| If at first you don't succeed, failure may be your style. | We are the future of the world and nothing can sto |
| Not all pain is gain! | Cowardice rules - if that's OK |
| Mediocrity - it takes a lot less time and most people won't notice the difference until it's too late. | Every dark cloud has a silver lining and lightning kills hundreds of people every year who are trying to find it! |
| Hard work often pays off after time, but laziness always pays off now! | Hang on in there, retirement is only 30 years away! |
| If we don't take care of the customers, maybe they'll stop bugging us! | Attitudes are contagious. Mine might kill you! |
| It's always darkest just before it goes pitch black | In the battle between you and the world, bet on the world |
| The flogging will continue until morale improves! | A person who smiles in the face of adversity probably has a scapegoat. |
| Never put off until tomorrow what you can avoid altogether. | It could be that your purpose in life is only to serve as a warning to others. |
| Lost. Small dog with bent ear, broken leg, bruised eye, burnt tail. Answers to the name of 'Lucky' | |
 Go the extra mile, it makes the boss look like a complete slacker! |
 To help us meet out tight financial targets for the year end, until further notice the light at the end of the tunnel has been switched off! |
| but please don't ever use..... You don't have to be mad to work here, but it helps | |